I really enjoyed reading it – though I feel some issues might be a bit exaggerated, but you surely did address many issues that need contemplation to bring about a change.I presume this post is about the Indians settled abroad and the local citizens there, so I might not be able to reflect on all points mentioned, as I feel I might not have the proper understanding reading of the scenario there.
I just wish if we started to consider each other as fellow human beings and set aside the cultural and religious differences.
I don’t say they don’t matter, but what matters more is the spirit of love, if it is true.
I personally believe that differences make the relationship more interesting and no amount of culture or money can for sure make your relationship successful.
Tagged as: alter, bride, culture, daugther, divorce, education, family background, indian marriage, marriage proposal, medical school, non-Indian, professional, religious, reputation, sacrifice, wedding day I don’t really like the material culture! And yes I am a creative and ‘freelancer’ does that mean I’ll be a pauper forever? lol you’re wealthier beyond belief b/c you’re doing what you want and following your life passions which is going to bring you gobs of money! Of course, if you’re making six figures and have the palatial house, you might get Indian suitors. ’ Rational things like this, is what they fear 😉 But it’s my duty to catapult them into progress, isn’t it??!!!!! We’re all human at the end of the day, so play on their emotions, that’s my tactic ! hahahah There is a lot to be said for the fear of the unknown.
And as far as I know, that’s not in your near future. But when I DO think of how my family would react – it’s not about the money, the social status, the education, etc – it’s the fear of my having children with a non-Muslim and then raising them non-Muslim. And it’s also the fear of an ‘unknown’ culture – ‘how on earth do we DEAL with a non-Muslim? We don’t drink, so we cannot POSSIBLY have anything in common, right????? I’d share my blog with the rest of your family for the spiritual awakening they’re going to need with your marriage to a non-Asian person.
And no this has nothing to do with you unless you plan to marry into an Indian family. I actually don’t know anyone non-Asian that has married into an Asian family – perhaps I’ll be the first??!
I think the fear of the unknown and uncertainty are two things that drive our families to act very nervous in these relationships.
I know what you mean by the ‘rational’ things we fear about cross-cultural relationships which are completely irrational and borderline nutty. Oh wait, you said alcohol’s out of the question right?
Vishnu, you have described the cultural mindset of Indian parents with such wit and humor, even though this could be such a serious situation for the young couple embroiled in this scenario. I don’t think it’s as cynical and whacky as I talk about it Martha but I’d argue it’s close:) They probably have different intentions than the way I describe it.
I really learned a lot from what you wrote here as I was completely unaware of the Indian “prejudice” toward those with different backgrounds. I’d imagine parents want their kids to be comfortable, know their values and culture and have plenty of certainty in their lives. The way these things play out in real life is rather humorous though, if you take a step back and observe all the social and cultural interactions.
Hi Vishnu, This is a good satirical as well as humorous post!